Why Is Everything So Perfect?

Your host: PIZZA FOR BREAKFAST

Below is an earlier post, published several years ago. Please enjoy…

---

Why Is Everything So Perfect?

How much longer is “Perfect” going to remain the favorite buzzword? 

It’s on everyone’s tongues these days… I hear it everywhere I go… Even in settings where it may not be entirely appropriate. 

“Perfect, perfect, perfect. “

Is everything really that darned perfect? 

---

That word is a lot to live up to.  The Webster’s Dictionary I keep on my desk defines “Perfect” as:  1.a:  being entirely without fault or defect:  flawless. 

I Can’t Take the Pressure!

For example, we were in a training session at work, learning the new electronic filing procedures for the IL state court filing system. Lucky for us, we had an in-person, live demonstration from the spokesperson.

I theorized our speaker was possibly a former military commander.  She was a no-nonsense woman, dressed in business-like clothing (grey suit with black pumps), with her hair pulled into a tight bun. 

Her crisp, staccato voice certainly had me at attention.  And I didn’t want to cross her. 

Presenter to the audience: 

“Any questions?  No?  PERFECT.  Next slide please,” as she tapped her pointer at the screen.

By this time I was afraid to ask any questions at all for risk of making things less than … well, Perfect.  I even abstained from the snacks they offered, for fear of making munching noises. 

I’m [more than] Slightly Imperfect

Everyone knows I’m less than Perfect.  Such as when I feed food from my plate to the dog, even though the hostess asks me not to do so. 

I also eat from utensils that drop onto the ground – without pausing to clean them.   Yum.

The “Perfect” Buzzword Is Everywhere

I even hear this standard response when I run my errands or make simple phone calls, such as when I recently phoned to make an appointment to see my dentist: 

Receptionist:  Your last name please.

Me:  V as in Victory – a – n.  H – o w –e.

Receptionist:  Perfect.

Whew!  I’ve been practicing that one for decades.

Receptionist:  And what is your main concern?

Me:  I have a tooth that’s killing me.  Gosh, I hope I don’t have to get a root canal.

Receptionist:  [typing]  Perfect…

Clearly, she’s missing the irony here.

Receptionist:  Unfortunately, it seems the dentist has a full schedule.  The earliest time we can get you in is Tuesday, January 2, 2018, at 7:30 in the morning.  How does that work for you?

Me:  PERFECT. 

---

Have an amazing — imperfect — day.

---

Thank you for reading — PIZZA FOR BREAKFAST